Deadly Cell Phone Virus Rumor Has Countries in Uproar

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Authorities in Pakistan and Afghanistan say that people are in a frenzy because of a rumour of a deadly virus being transmitted by cell phone.

Seriously.

The rumours claim that “as soon as you answer your phone blood comes out of your mouth, nose and ears and you die.”

According to a spokeperson for a local telecom company, their switchboard has been swamped with calls from worried customers. “These rumors are completely baseless. They do not make any sense in technological terms,” acknowledged Farah Hussain, a spokeswoman for Warid Telecom, and yet, she said that they are being indundated with calls.

Authorities are blaming the local Taliban for the rumour. “I find it necessary to assure the people that the rumour spreading around the city is absolute nonsense – it’s baseless,” explained interior ministry spokesman Zemarai Bashary. “It is,” he said “the work of the enemy.”

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